Living in Jeju

We just had an all-day meeting yesterday for EPIK teachers at Halla University here on Jeju Island. It was an orientation meeting to inform us about living in Jeju/South Korea. Although a chunk of the day was very boring and about politics, government, the education system and things we have already learned or figured out ourselves, it did remind me of all the differences in the culture here. I want to share some with you and certain customs, behaviors and interesting facts that we have learned and are still adjusting to.

One thing is for sure, this society is similar to confucianism and Taoism, with its manners and hierarchical relations, although the majority of Koreans are Christians. Age determines nearly all of the relationships here and classes people into different social hierarchies. For example, the older you are, the more respect you receive and the more you are looked up to. For this reason, it is very important and common for Koreans to ask you how old you are when they first meet you. If they are the same age as you, you are immediately considered their friend and sometimes they might call you brother or sister. If you are younger, the older Korean will comfort you and make sure you are taken care of and will treat you when eating or drinking out. Also, the elders will always eat or drink first at a meal and are bowed down to by anyone who is younger. When I am walking outside and pass an elder looking at me, I usually will give a small bow and then do a smaller bow back (only with the head) to show that I respected them and it's their way of saying hi. Koreans will usually give you a limp handshake in order to not appear rude or overbearing. Also, people are very over-polite and will compliment you on small things in order to preserve social harmony (confuscisian). It is also important to have small talk before talking about business. It is said (I have not experienced myself though) that making direct eye contact when speaking is seen as disrespectful. But as a foreigner, you can get away with these types of things. However, foreigners do get stared and pointed at a lot! I try to enjoy feeling like a star and special when every little kid practices their English with me by saying "hi, how are you?". However, everyone has those days that they just don't want to be stared at!

"Anneongsayo" is another way to say hi, with the "ayo" on the end making it polite or formal. This actually translates to "How are you?", but as I learned by my co-teacher, a Korean would never respond by actually telling you how they are, they would reply "anneongsayo" or "hi" back. This seems so funny to me, but traditionally Koreans do not share emotions or feelings. However, my students are very good at answering me honestly when I ask them "how are you?" They will sometimes respond with "not very good" or "so so"; and then when I ask them why, they reply honestly, "because I am so tired" or "because I have to study". It is also common for boys and girls who are friends (usually girls with girls and guys with guys) to hold eachother's hands or wrap eachother's arms around one another...they are a very close culture.

It is interesting that Korean woman are usually very shy, timid, and compassionate before they get married, and then at one point when they are known as "ojummas" or "older lady", they have what is known as "ojumma power". Ojummas seem to have this inner strength that allows them to not move aside for anyone, or not apologize for bumping into you or not have a problem with correcting you (this has actually happened when I was using a fitness equipment wrong...but I was happy that she told me the right way!) Ojummas are tough when working out in the field or taking care of their family. You definitely don't want to mess with an ojumma! :)Older male, on the other hand, are known as "ojishmi", and also have very high authority. They will often have a very straight face, not smiling or no expression.

However, I have found Koreans all to have a very good sense of humor. They will laugh and make jokes, smile when they do something wrong, and have kids' cartoon characters on business signs, along with little bobble heads on flowers or some cute character in their cars or in buses, and everyone spends lots of time with family. It is very common to see families out near the ports, where they can practice rollerblading or biking, or sit watching the ferries or planes leave, or watching the fisherman try to catch squid fish. Families also spend a lot of time walking or hiking on the mountains or in the parks, or on the beaches.

"Keeping one's face" is especially important to Koreans. Another words, it is important for Koreans to not be placed outside of a group, but feel very accepted not embarassed. So if a student were misbehaving and you put them in front or back of the classroom to stand for punishment, they sometimes will beg the teacher not to do this so that they wouldn't be placed outside of the group and to keep their face in the situation.
Also, I think being a part of a group is probably why teachers feel it is important to go out after school for dinner and drinks with their entire staff...they even have a name for it, "peshik". During my first week of teaching, I went out twice with my teachers and we all got to know one another better and the drinks made everyone more relaxed and less shy to use their English.

Another interesting thing I have learned is that when a baby turns 1, they have a big celebration. One of the teachers in my office even brought in a bunch of food for a few days in a row because her baby had just turned one. Korean people pick their children's names based on a fortune teller. If the fortune teller does not like the name they picked out, they are given 3-4 alternative options to choose from. They will also put objects in front of the baby to see what the baby reaches for...which brings symbolic meaning to their life. For example, if the baby reaches for a pencil, they will be smart, if they reach for money, they will be wealthy, and if they reach for a computer mouse, they will be great with technology, and rice cake represents good metabolism, while a string means living a long life. So interesting!